Posted by: Dr Churchill | August 13, 2014

Captain oh my Captain

Captain oh my Captain

Methinks, we’ve been robbed in the game of round Robin

“The loneliest people are the kindest.

The saddest people smile the brightest.

All because they do not wish to see

anyone suffer the way they do.”

~ Unknown

Death is the Father of us all…

Every time this terrible father visits me, am repulsed, saddened, and chastised, by the rudeness of it all.

For he is a rude father. An alcoholic, angry, petty, little man, who has no time to be nice and no interest in being liked.

So it is always that when someone close to us dies, or when we are close to dying ourselves, right then before the lights go out — our mood turns sober and foul.

Seriously thinking about what it is we leave behind, when we enter the tunnel of Love and glimpse the white light, is a “High” much like when we aim to kill ourselves…

We enter another realm well in advance of our imminent departure. we are also at a foul and sober mood, because none of us can truly know what we mean to other people, and none of us can know what our future will bring.

Nor do we know what our immortal self will experience.

History and philosophy ask us to remember these mysteries, to look around at friends, family, humanity, at the surprises life brings — the endless possibilities that living offers — and to persevere.

But that is all hypocrisy. Because when you’ve got to go You’ve got to go…

And when you are the Captain oh My Captain… You’re going to see that underlying humanity, even in this act of ending it all.

So my Captain … I wish you a Great Trip to the hereafter and bid my Regards to the Angels that will ferry you there; for we all are coming to join you. Sooner rather than later and when we get together we’ll have a fancy dress party like when we lived nearby in the Mission and the party was always on. On, each and every night…

And forgive me cause when you were taking the most terrible decision of your life, and you needed someone with that deep down, bedrock humanity, so you can hear their voice and decide to stay — we weren’t there.

Yet we’ll be watching this show, powerless in the barbaric howling of why talented and funny men have to check out early.

Of course, You knew that there is always love, and insight, and children to live for, but when the light fades and the river of Life darkens and the walls are closing in — it is right to leave.

Still we had moments to cherish, and things to do, and parties to plan, and plays to organize. But even back then, the possibility of happiness, the chance of helping someone else through their own troubles, and the act of extroverting the Tragedy and Comedy of Life on stage — helped us all get through.

But these are all old times and moments of the past, and am now only interested in that unknowable place called “The Future.” The future, the moment of time that hasn’t arrived yet. And this unknowable place in time is what I’ll miss from you, because we could do this together.

Still am here today, testament, so you must know that people help us get through things. Even when they faintly understand how much courage it takes to stay. And you stayed this far… The ones who know that are grateful and all messed up sad. The assholes who don’t know that — are just that … and you can forget about them.

Cause even when you are deeply lost in the darkening hours, dwelling in the night shadows, and dreading the light of day — please bear witness to the side of being human and the bravery it takes to wait up for the sun.

Sit still with me and if we manage to sing away the darkness, we’ll travel across. And if we don’t we’ll just meditate upon the lack of human wisdom. So come be brave in your travels and may a Thousand Adventures await you in the upperworld.

For the rest of us, let’s just hope that we may find there is enough reason to be here. Enough reason so we can persist each and every day to see the dawn of the sun. Instead of looking to find out the roots, and maybe thread our way back to happiness, leaving this world.

For all the others bereft of company to keep — read the Poets. Or still your heart and take the first step to Life: Reason.

Rational thought is the most radical medicine in times of sorrow. Rationalize and consider the arguments, look at the evidence and maybe choose differently.

Maybe choose to stay. Stay your hand and stay back. Hold your horses and lay down your weapon of choice.

Put away the pills and the cold steel. Wound the rope back in the shed and unhook the ladder.

Have a walk – make a pot of tea – take a bath –
light a candle – meditate…

Do these things to get the angry man out of your head and out of your homehouse.

And wait, cause after that, anything can happen.



But for all of us here, job number one is, we’ve got to choose to stay.

Stay and enjoy a bit more of our Welcome to this Earth even though we might feel like Trespassers at the moment.

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